fears & insecurities

hey all!
im feeling better, thanks thanks so much for the comforting tags =)
as for dose which are not-so-comforting, i appreciate it but i wud like to hear something nicer pls.. hahaha, LOVE YA GUYS! esp ting & lin

hahaa, spent quite a fulfilling day outside on thurs.
went to queenstown with shan shan loretta lionel russell calvin to check out the class tees..
errrm, hahaa it wasnt really fruitful leh.. i tink our class tee wud take lik a hundred more years to decide. lol
norwin joined us after lunch and we went parkway for pool..
hahaa.. i played a few rounds :DD
at first i jus sat aside watch, hahaha but the urge was too overwhelming. lol
i got win HOR. hahahaha
next time mus play agn le =) hahaa.. as usual we played photohunt loh, as usual i was the vital player loh. hahahahahha!! kidding lah. H L S were the vital players. =)

after that met ting lin wenru to eat supper at geylang. hahaha random grp right
went to wen dao shi, not bad lah the dim sum there.. :D esp the fried prawn rolls & carrot cake & some dofu.
hahaa, den we jus talk crap loh. =p
after that went drink soya bean.. lol sit there until 11+ den decided to go off cos my mum called, opps din realise i'd be out until this late =/
okayy and so we were on our way back....
den unfortunately for me my hp ran out of battery.. hai den when i algihted the bus i regretted not asking my father to fetch me from tamp inter, cos the night looks scary ah.
hmm den i saw 293 & i happily chased n boarded e bus.... but i took the wrong 293, hahaa took the red one instead of the green one. aiyah..
so i got off at some bus stop den borrowed a fone from an auntie to call my father.
haaha den the auntie at firz was v hesitant bout lending me the fone, cos she scared i run off with it, so i asked her to hold my fone while i call.
sigh, so i was rescued loh.

it felt v stupid, and iz the second time i borrowed a fone from stranger in times of urgent need. hope there wont be a third.
hai, still mus convince them that im not some desperate handfone thief sia.. sob.
i think im over reliant on my fone, feel veri insecure whenever it run out of batt, esp at night.
hahaa den jus now i saw fone booths, and i hav ten cent coin.. but walaueh, nid to insert cashcard to use fonebooth i tink. hahaa, its like normally who will care bout the existence of the fonebooths ah, but still i cudnt use them.
haha.

okay enough of my sorrowful life,
hahaa, went shopping at bugis with lin & loretta after last exam paper and we all managed to buy stuff! hahaa and i dont mind going on a few more shopping trips =p
whee, tmr i'll be going over to chew peng's hse with a few g-ers to pay her a visit agn :DD
yay, time for some catching up!!!!






thank God for giving me a great family and lots of cute frens too :)

finally..

had a heart to heart talk with my mum..
hahaa.. really feel much better now.

we both cried, pains me to see her cry.
i guess my family lacks communication.. its lik simply jus four ppl living under the same roof type, although my parents got talk to each other alot lah, but me n my sister oso not v close.. and we're not close to our parents oso. partly is the generation gap but iz mostly lack of patience on OUR {sister&me} part.
both of us are temperamental, and...we really take them for granted.
den its like, we rarely spend time tgt as a family.. even havin a meal tgt is a challenging task.
i dont knw why this happened.. but last time i wud oways confide in my mum.
now i think i shud still do the same too, she nids to knw whats on my mind and i nid to reassure her that im okay.
now i understand..



im blessed with such nice parents,
yet im not cherishing them as much as they do of me.
& i knw nth i do wud be enough to repay them..

...

end to days of agony

but trouble never ends.

if only..

http://www.esurveyspro.com/Survey.aspx?id=34c66ed4-0ca2-4772-91c7-35786e7f5736
help me with this survey thanks!!! ;DD

went out with yol, py, kaiwei, sheena on friday! hahaa
took LOTS of neos and went shopping at town, but im the only one who managed to buy sth.
hahaa and due to our encouragement, pei yun finally had her ears pierced..
oh, and we bought this cute robot earring each.. hahaha
next time den i post the pics lah.
heh, and we slacked at macs for nearly 2 hrs.. jus to take lots n lots of pictures.
it was enjoyable, and we'll be meeting up agn on thurs to study at temasek poly! hahaha
yay =) lookin forward to the food and the study area in tp, and needless to say, to take lots of pics agn! :DDD

went to storm for a haircut with linz on saturday... hahaha
linz asked for kason, the CREATIVE DIRECTOR {which we dint realise until much later :)} of storm and i asked for "anybodi will do".
and TO MY HORROR,
the person signalled to a.... not-so-young and not-so-skilled hairdresser to cut my hair..
{recall; i went to storm the previous time and i was v dissatisfied....... hahaaa and COINCIDENTALLY... the hairdresser i met on saturday and the one i am mentioning here are the same =/}
nearly got heart attack loh, so.... i asked for kason too.
hahaa and i din regret.. i tink he's really talented.but...his rate oso v different ah. lol
iz like storm got so mani talents but why of all people i mus tio the not so skilled and not so young de?... hahaa

so after that we went to ZHU's hse to pay her a visit :D
she jus had her op the previous day...
poor thing, her movements are v restricted.. lets pray for a quick recovery for her!
take care zhu! :)

sunday was our class CIP.. hahaa we were suppose to help out at the game stalls for a family carnival in pasir ris... but.. erm turned out that there were other volunteers from another sch helping out at the stalls. so my class was left with nth much to do.
so we jus slack ard.. eat,chat,watch the performances, played the games {exactly like what most pasir ris residents did there -.-} & we did some labour work... which iz to carry the lucky draw prizes from one place to another. hahaha.. firz prize 32 inch LCD TV!! some lucky person got it.
right, & i din feel lik i was doing cip loh. hahaha..
after that went out for dinner to celebrate fathers day :)

and i finally studied today after slacking for 3 days. met alot of ppl at tampines area....*cough cough.

hahaa.. alrightttt.
oh yah, please check out yu ting's blogshop!
refer to my links.. ;)
yu ting's my sister's fren.. so im tryin to promote it.
hahaa i tink her handmade accessories are really nice and affordable! heh.. so remember to check them out :)

just once will do.

YO...

woke up at 830 today!
hahaa.. pei zhu go sgh for her blood test..
hmm.. everytime i go hospital my legs would go wobbly.. sigh, &by lookin at the glum faces i wud be overwhelmed by this indescribable feeling.. something like the fear of facing death.
not cursing anyone there lah but death its like a part of life..and it sounds scary to me.

o k a y . . .
and so we ended at ard 11+ or sth?
hahaa went bugis walk walk and met linz at mos for lunch..
afterwhich........... we went TIONG BAHRU to collect her perfume. hahaha
people lucky worxxzxxzx.. win a bottle of free perfume {in exchange for that snoopy bottle..........shud be worth it lah;DD}
alright... by then i was vvv tired alr....
so we took bus to queenstown and mrt-ed back to tamp. hahaa.............
..............


right.
zhu n me went library to study with nana.......
okay...........



seriously tired, type until i gona fall alseep le.
byee guys.

everything will be fine :D
be strong, believe.

smun photos :)

heyyyy guys!

hahaa.. i shall post the SMUN pics here to show u that me n loretta are not outcasts =p

here goes the evidence :

;)we're the EXCLUSIVE UN security council 07.

so the truth is, out of so many many many pics that they took, only a few include our faces. hahaha.... oh well............ go figure.

hahaa, went library with linz today since our attempt to yesterday FAILED terribly. hahaha

{ended up slping at home ytd}

hahaa.. not bad for a START, finished reading 3 sets of notes >.<

studied from 5+ till 7+.. hahaa den ate dinner.

AND ACCOMPANIED 70 TO EAT DINNER TOO.

hahaa.. while waiting for 70,we played fotohunt at tm arcade and we were SECOND.

considering the fact that we played twice only... this really proved our prowess huh..

reached home at 11+!

could have reached home earlier de.. like say 9+?

byee :)

SMUN

HEY.
im back..
hahaa.. to put it bluntly, i feel that this camp was quite a waste of time..
the whole thing is like a debate on the issue, "nuclear crisis in north korea"..
me n loretta rep indonesia.. so iz like.. we only play a small part in it. hahaa
hmmm den throughout the conference sessions.. we have nothin to say at all. LOL.
i really admire ppl from other jcs.. they were v fluent n knowledgeable..
when i said the opening speech i was alr damn nervous lah. cos the atmosphere was entirely different frm the usual classroom style... considered vv formal. arghh.

so most of the time we were glued to our seats. hahaa.. not like others who kept goin up to speak. okay, but we werent the only ones, haha.. there were 3 other countries who were quiet also, so we kinda formed an alliance with them the next day.

hai.. the first day was horrible for us.
we even felt like going home.. hahaa dats how bad it was.
cos we nvr talk much mah.. so we were not needed n on our own.. like outcasts lidat hahaa
haiiiii it was then i finally understand the feelings of an outcast.. well not exactly lah at least i stiu have loretta.. imagine if i were alone.
i wud hav cabbed home straight hahaha
kena pangseh by them for a few times.......... :(
felt really pathetic.
but at night it was a lil better i guess.. played block catching..
after that had a long chat with loretta before goin to slp at 2am.. hahaa

the next day was much much better..
started to know more ppl... and loretta went up to speak for indo! hahaa :D
nth much lah aye.. haaha stayed up the whole night.. was playin bridge with 3 other delegates hahaha..
errrrm
as a result we slept till 12+ the next day.. skipped 2 conference sessions =p
and i went up to speak for like less than 15 sec. hahaa.
okay.. for the 3rd night we played werewolf/werwolf. quite fun lah :D

right, just by blogging bout this im feeling bored alr. hahaa...
sian lah.. i haven been studyin at all since the start of holidays.
not goin zoo cip tmr.. feeling v tired!!



anyway.. that wasnt much of an experience afterall.
on the other hand, i actually feel that im a worse person..
when it comes to facing new people, there's oways this protective layer around me.
ohwell.. mayb cos dose ppl are like a higher level de gan jue.. kinda stress when facing them. hahaa
although there are exceptions to it.
kayy gudbye :D



all i've got to pull me through is memories of you.

TIRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2ND JUNE
mayday's concert was a blast!
let the pics do the talkin. {simply cos im too lazy}

before the start of concert. wah lau the lightsticks not nice one... use until the middle of concert den it became vv dim. lousyy lah look like traffic police kind. hai and sad to say me n my sister were quite far from the stage cos we're at the 3rd section.. but we moved front durin the concert. hahaa..

THERE HE IS :D grand opening this time round!! got fireworks! hahaha btw iz held in max pavillion of expo.

BAI MA WANG ZI!!! his vocals damn POWER!

damn highhhhh.
i really love their music to BITS!

dat includes chinese & HOKKIEN songs!! yah their hokkien songs damnnn touching. hahaa for dose LOSERS out there.. their hokkien songs not dose very TAI ones hor.

ehhh love him also! hahaha he's damn attractive when he plays the electronic guitar!!

hahaha i tink this is cute.

aye my eyes are like closing now.. shall upload one LAST pic!

so open ure eyes wide! hahaa

sigh, hate this part the most! :(

.......

really enjoyed every piece of music they played.

hahaa.. somemore there were hard core USA, HK, and malaysia fans who turned up at the concert! and i saw one uncle v hip sia.. hahaah he oso damn enthu lah. waved lightstick n did the L-O-V-E action too! hahahaa.

mayb they wud be here agn next year and it'll be at the indoor stadium.

till then.

JUMP!! li kai di qiu biao mian (:

1 more day =)

iz almost 2 am.. =/

hai.. now im startin to wonder why i signed up for that smun camp..
iz gona take up 4 days of my precious holidays.. :(
hmmmm ...

i have so many other things to do.. i really hope i'll have time for my family especially since i haven bring my mum out to shop for so long.. v guilty.. everytime go out with my frens nia.
SIAN AH!!!
went shopping with my usual clique loh. finally, our long awaited shopping trip!!!
hahaha.. but we came back empty-handed -.-
it oways turns out this way huh...
i gotta find something purple to wear during the social night, which iz the last night of our hist camp.. hopefully can geddit by end of this week.
hahaaa.. took lots of pics :D
will upload them in frenster..

hai, when i reached home i saw ONE HUGE BAG OF ITEMS which my sister bought today!
wah seh.. Guess handbag somemore.. she say got sale.. discounted price 80+.. original 149. but still...... she like haven even get her pay den spend finish all alr....

man, i look at her and im worried bout our future.. seriously, sometimes i see her spend until like that i oso scared to spend money loh.
she's not a bad sister lah.. v nice to me but haii, havin a shopaholic sis doesnt help too.
ok nvm, i shall hav faith in her..


sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh still have opening speech and pw to do...............
rubbbbbbbish.
my holidays are stretched :(


AT LEAST ITS ONE MORE DAY TILL THE BIG DAY.